How to navigate the ‘talking stage’ in dating

Many people are unsure of what happens in a talking stage, so we felt it’s only appropriate to list the essential rules of talking stages.

What is a talking stage?
Talking stage is a millennial/Gen Z term for people who are just talking to/getting to know each other with hopes of a romantic relationship. It’s a pre-dating stage full of calls, texts and dates.

What are the essential guidelines
1. Talking to someone all the time is not a talking stage.
Never mistake boredom for interest, because you have all their time and attention doesn’t mean they want to date or be with you.

Compliments, sweet words, telling you all about their day, and even hanging out often is not a talking stage. It is a talking stage when there is a mutual agreement that you both are considering a relationship.

2. Never assume you are the only one they are talking to
I was once in a talking stage with someone who didn’t want me to talk to anyone else – that’s a delusion.

If you want them exclusively, then drop hints about being with only them, and show intent that they are important to you. If they don’t reciprocate your energy, bow out respectfully.

3. A talking stage without an actual meeting is a waste of time
If you live in the same city or even close by and a physical date isn’t planned, just know that they enjoy flirting with you, and it’s nothing serious. You are not in a talking stage. Someone said a talking stage of just chatting is called pen pals.

4. A talking stage that lasts more than a month is a waste of time
If you keep talking endlessly without anyone moving the talking stage into a relationship, you are just wasting your time, and very soon someone will ghost the other. Talking stages should be two weeks tops.

For long term friendships, that is you’ve been friends for a while, if you table a relationship request and it isn’t accepted, move on.

5. Constant sex is not a talking stage
If when you were approached what was offered was sex, it was a fuck buddy deal that was offered. Do not think that it would somehow develop into a talking stage. It might or it might not – don’t get your hopes up.

The point of a talking stage is a relationship, do not let anyone reel you into talking too much and answering endless questions about yourself.

After two weeks, if a relationship isn’t in sight clearly or at least a little, let them know you are no longer interested or just ghost them.